This post contains affiliate links. By purchasing through these links you are helping me keep The Homemaker's Cottage running with no added cost to you!
You walk through your home (which you’ve cleaned three times today), and somehow there’s still mail piled on the table, your husband’s hat and coffee mug are on the counter… again… the dishes are piled in the sink, and you’re still tripping over toys. You’re overwhelmed, exhausted, and you just crave that feeling of a clean house with a candle lit. But how do you get there amidst the mess?
Having true peace isn’t about a spotless house (because let’s face it, that’s rarely achievable!), it’s about finding God’s peace amid the everyday chaos. By weaving gratefulness and intention into your daily routine, you can have peace even when your house is messy.
Cultivate a Grateful Heart
As homemakers, we often pour ourselves out for everyone else, and it can feel like our efforts go unnoticed. Gratitude helps us shift our focus from what we lack to what we have, even in the midst of a messy day.
When we start shifting our attitude from stress to gratitude, it opens up our eyes to notice the small things each day, and we start to notice more to be grateful for. Some small things you can do to practice gratitude can be things like:
- Keep a small notebook by your bed and each night, jot down one thing you’re grateful for from that day. It can be as simple as ‘my child’s smile’ or ‘a warm cup of coffee.
- Say what you’re thankful for out loud. When you start to acknowledge all of God’s blessings out loud, you can find your mood starts to change for the better quickly.
- Be grateful for the small things. Oftentimes, especially in this fast-paced society, we don’t notice the small things such as a good night’s sleep (right mamas?), a warm cup of tea, a small bite of chocolate, or a smile from your child. Sometimes on the bad days noticing the small things can make a huge difference.
So instead of stressing about the dishes in the sink, be grateful you’re able to have food on the table, or that you have the ability and resources to make food at all. Instead of being upset about your husband’s hat and coffee mug on the table, be grateful your husband is home and healthy. Instead of being grumpy about the toys littering the floor, be grateful that your children get to have a childhood and create wonderful worlds of imagination in a safe and warm home. Finding things to be grateful for doesn’t have to be a great feat, it can be as easy as noticing the sunshine. Having this shift in perspective can make a huge difference.
Create Moments of Calm in Your Day
Self-care, even in small doses, can make a huge difference in your day. If you’re in a difficult stage of life, like me, with a baby and toddler at home, literally washing my hair can make a massive difference in my day. Getting both the kids to nap at once and taking the time for a bite of chocolate and a chapter in my newest book can give me such peace that it fuels the rest of my day. These little moments of calm aren’t a luxury; they’re essential for our well-being as homemakers. We can’t pour from an empty cup.
There are easy ways to make some peaceful pockets in your day, such as:
- A few minutes of deep breathing or silent prayer
- Enjoying a cup of coffee or tea
- Listening to calming music
- Spending time in nature, even if it means looking out the window in winter
Some days, you might only have time for one of these. That’s okay! The important thing is to prioritize self-care, even in small ways.
Now, even if you have a busy schedule, there are ways to incorporate these into your day. One way is to set reminders on your phone. Even if it’s for 5-30 minutes a day, you can make a huge impact on your nervous system by taking time for yourself. Another way is to combine tasks with calming activities, such as listening to calming music while doing the dishes, or looking out the window and noticing all the things outside with your children.
Finding time in your day seems overwhelming oftentimes, but the key to this is making time in your day. It’s time you give yourself care as well so sacrifice something small that doesn’t matter and give that time back to yourself.
Quick Tip: Whether your children nap or not, a designated quiet time can be a lifesaver. Schedule it during nap time or whenever your kids seem to need a break. Offer a variety of calming activities: napping, audiobooks (our Yoto player is a favorite!), reading, crafts, puzzles, coloring, or even learning a new skill like sewing or embroidery. Consistent quiet time will help your children find peace and develop valuable self-regulation skills.
Declutter with Intention (Not Perfection)
A cluttered home can often feel like a cluttered mind. Decluttering isn’t about achieving Instagram perfection; it’s about creating a more peaceful and manageable environment. It’s okay to have a lived-in home. The goal is to reduce visual overwhelm and create a space you enjoy being in.
Here are some small, achievable steps to get you started:
- Decluttering one drawer at a time
- Doing a one-thing-in, one-thing-out rule
- Finding homes for everything in your home, and if it doesn’t have a home or a use, it’s time for it to go
You can also join us over in The Homemaker’s Corner for our decluttering daily challenge that happened in March 2025.
By decluttering your home, you give yourself more control of your house, more time to make peace for yourself and less time spent constantly cleaning.
Embrace Imperfection and Let Go of Expectations
Social media can make us feel like we’re constantly failing because our homes don’t look like those perfectly curated images. But those images rarely reflect the reality of a busy family life. In looking for peace, a slower life is more worth living.
Let go of unrealistic expectations and embrace the messiness of life. Now, does that mean you should let your home be dirty, as many new influencers are trying to normalize? No, but I’ll get into that in another post. Being a little messy in the space of everyday life is okay; perfection is not the goal, peace is. Give yourself permission to not have it all together. You’re a human being, you are not God, and you cannot do it all. God doesn’t expect perfection; He calls us to faithfulness. He sees your heart and your efforts, even when things are messy. Maybe dinner is takeout tonight, or the laundry isn’t folded perfectly. That’s okay! Give yourself grace. You’re doing the best you can.
I have a few “rules” in my house that embrace the mess just for a little while to help me find time to give myself peace. One of those is that I only do the dishes once a day, no matter how badly they pile up. Each evening, while dinner is cooking, I will throw a show or playlist on my phone and tackle the dishes. While it’s an eyesore most days, it gives me space to give more to myself and my family rather than be in a constant cycle of trying to tackle the dishes.
Set Intentions for Your Day
As homemakers, our days can feel like a never-ending to-do list. Setting intentions helps us prioritize what truly matters and brings a sense of purpose to our day. By setting intentions and expectations for your day, you’re giving yourself a focus and guide on how to run your day. By doing this you can bring focus and purpose to even your most chaotic days. Some simple intentions that you can start with are things like:
- Put away my phone for 30 minutes and play a game with my family
- Find 5 things to be grateful for
- Find 10 things to donate today
- Clean the kitchen
- Have a dance party with your children
- Make time to snuggle your baby for one nap
Setting intentions is easy and can help you remember what is most important each and every day, and that anything outside of those few intentions can wait for another day (as can the stress of thinking about them).
Some ways of making your intentions known for the day include:
- Writing down your intentions (whether on a chalkboard or in your phone ,or planner)
- Reviewing your intentions throughout the day
- Praying over your intentions throughout the day
When we set intentions, we’re more likely to act with intention, which can create a more peaceful and focused atmosphere in our homes.
Finding Peace in the Everyday
Peace in the everyday isn’t some elusive, unattainable goal. It’s built through small, intentional moments, like the ones we’ve discussed. It’s about cultivating gratitude, creating pockets of calm, and embracing imperfection. Be patient with yourself. Some days will be smoother than others. If you have a particularly chaotic day, don’t beat yourself up about it. Just start fresh tomorrow, focusing on those small steps that bring you closer to peace.
John 14:27: “Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Don’t let your hearts be troubled and don’t be afraid.”
Share your tips for finding peace in the comments below! Let’s support each other on this journey.
Hello! I'm Amanda Elizabeth, creator of The Homemaker's Cottage. As a homemaker I have constantly felt the pull between old fashioned homemaking and the fast paced world we live in today. So I created The Homemaker's Cottage: a stress-free space between the old in the new, where there is no judgement and we can learn that homemaking can be relevant, easy and even enjoyable.
Join me on this journey to serve God, your family, and begin homemaking from where you are.
Leave a Reply