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Every girl or woman I know looks in the mirror and says “I wish I was…” or “I wish I wasn’t…” Never have I heard someone say, “Wow, I love that about me!” or “Hey I’m looking good today!” without saying but after the statement. Why do we feel this way? How come can we never feel complete and whole? Why can’t we just be loving to ourselves without adding ifs ands or buts?
There is one simple answer to all of these questions. The answer is:
Sin.
That’s the one and only simple truth. God didn’t create us as ugly beings or as beasts. He created us in the image of Himself.
So God created mankind in His own image, in the image of God He created them; male and female He created them. ~Genisis 1:27
Listen to that!! He created you. He creates all things perfect, righteous and wonderful. Not one thing that the Lord has made is unworthy of His love. It wasn’t until the enemy came along to Eve and enticed her to eat the apple that sin appeared. Along with sin came shame, guilt and alienation; thus destroying the beautiful and intimate relationship that we had with the Lord. It is from that moment that we now, still feel that guilt, shame and alienation.
The Guilt
“I should’ve gone to the gym, I would’ve lost that weight by now.”
“I should’ve bought that product, it would have made me look more beautiful.”
“Why did I eat that? I must have gained ten pounds!”
“I never get anything done on time! Why am I so stupid?!”
Now obviously, these are just (slightly over-exaggerated) examples, but you get the gist. We will always be regretting choices we made. We will never feel like it’s enough and it’s never enough because it’s our fault
The Shame
“I never know what to wear, I feel like a fool.”
“Why did I say that?! I made myself look like an idiot!
“That presentation was horrible! I can never show my face there again!”
“They’re laughing at me again. Why can’t I just be normal?”
You know the feeling, you’re in a social situation and it starts. The burning feeling in your cheeks, the rapid blood flow as your face blushes. You know everyone around you can see it and they’re looking. It gets worse. You are so ashamed of yourself for things that aren’t a big deal, aren’t in your control, or aren’t even a problem to begin with.
The Alienation
“No wonder no one hangs out with me, I’m such a freak.”
“There goes my crush again, too bad he’ll never notice me.”
“The girls are getting together again today….glad I was invited…”
“I wish I was a part of the popular crowd.”
Everyone feels this at one time or another. You’re on the outside. You’re not loved, accepted or wanted. You feel like you’re trapped in a bubble and everyone is passing you up without a glance in your direction. You’re lost with no sense of direction or purpose…you can’t see the future or any sunny days….
This is where the enemy wants you.
He wants you to feel alienated, alone, ashamed, and guilty. To be wandering around lost with no sense of direction or purpose. He loves that because he is the one who made you feel that way. He brought sin into our lives and relishes in these feelings. Many people who are stuck in this position stay there. Why? Because they don’t know the love, kindness, caring, or guidance that the Lord, their Father can provide for them. Luckily for you, you do.
Here’s what God says about you:
You are all together beautiful, my love; there is no flaw in you. ~Song of Soloman 4:7
Once again. You are beautiful, because God made you that way. He designed every hair on your head, every freckle on your face, every inch of your body and every trait you have. He took the time to create you and make you into a vessel of His being. His beloved child.
No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man. God is faithful, and he will not let you be tempted beyond your ability, but with the temptation he will also provide the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it. ~1 Corinthians 10:13
Although you feel guilty for the things you have done, the Lord has provided a way for you to escape the guilt so that you can endure and learn from what you have gone through; thus when the temptation comes again you will be ready to face it with the help of the Lord.
I sought the Lord, and he answered me and delivered me from all my fears. Those who look to him are radiant, and their faces shall never be ashamed. ~Psalm 34:4-5
Without the guidance of the Lord, we feel shame, we feel uncertain of ourselves and the decisions we make. We are constantly second guessing ourselves. But for those who have the wisdom to seek the Lord everyday in prayer will feel His guiding hand. When shrouded in the word of the Lord, one does not feel shame or guilt; but instead they feel pride in the Lord and happy to do His will. No person can make them feel small or ashamed for they are whole in the Lord.
Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. ~Isaiah 41:10
You are never alone. Although people may forsake you and keep you at a distance there is no reason to ever feel truly alone. When feeling alone, bow down in prayer, worship Him with all of your heart and you will know that He is truly with you and that He will not let you go.
When we do not love ourselves, we let ourselves be overcome with sin and we give in to the wishes of the enemy. Without loving ourselves we are not glorifying the work and love that He put into making us. When we do not love ourselves we are turning from Him and saying that His work is not good enough. That does not glorify the Lord or the life He has given you. So love yourself and remember how you were made. Remember the love and details that were put into your making. Love yourself because you are beautiful. You are worthy. And you are a child of God.
How do you show yourself, love? Leave a comment down below to help others find new ways to love themselves!
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Hello! I'm Amanda Elizabeth, creator of The Homemaker's Cottage. As a homemaker I have constantly felt the pull between old fashioned homemaking and the fast paced world we live in today. So I created The Homemaker's Cottage: a stress-free space between the old in the new, where there is no judgement and we can learn that homemaking can be relevant, easy and even enjoyable.
Join me on this journey to serve God, your family, and begin homemaking from where you are.
I love this! I actually came across a quote today that said, “Exercise because you love your body, not because you hate it.” I find that to be sooo true. I think it’s harmful when we try to eat healthier and work-out because we feel like we aren’t pretty enough or thin enough. I try my best to eat healthy because I love my body and eating healthy is my way of showing God that I appreciate His creation. And also, when we feel down because of a pimple or how we fit into a size 14 instead of a size 4, we are looking for gratification and happiness from those things instead of looking to God. It’s no different than an alcoholic reaching for a beer bottle or something like that.
great post!
I completely agree! And I love that quote!! We should always think of our bodies as temples that the Lord has made to honor Him. We should treat them and love them as such, and we should know that no matter what size we are or how many pimples, or scars we have that God LOVES us just the way we are!